I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
Either I get my picture taken sitting on a fuckin pony, or I'm not coming.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Randomize
