remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
I wish I could rss feed the hooker ads on craigslist because it looks suspicious that I check craigslist every hour.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
She's like a pop up book from hell.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
