i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
Yo, how much weed can I get for a caf swipe?
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize