I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Honestly dude, i think you should ignore the restraining order if you really love her.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
I just sent him a message bearing my soul about how much he means to me as a friend and his first response is "are you drunk?"
Shit like this is why I'm a bitch to everyone.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Randomize