i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
Randomize
