Ugh I have so many sins to confess tmw at church, you just made me think of many more I've made on that street alone
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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