Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Randomize
