i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I think my vagina is haunted
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
note to self, drunkenly bedazzeling the silverware was a stupid fucking idea
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
AFTER I licked the bald guys head they told me we weren't playing
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
