May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
Broke my ankle and blacked out on my scooter last night. 'Twas grand.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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