You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
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