just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
Drank another frat president under the table. Thinking of starting my own, gonna call it Alpha Phi Alcoholics
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Masturbating during the Olympics and cumming during the national anthem really is everything it's cracked up to be. Just thought you should know.
Update: the condoms are expired and Canadians are NOT to be trusted!
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
I realize ur driving andwont read this til u stop, but I'm sleeping in the bed of the pickup. Please don't hit a deer.
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