Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
