I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
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