Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize