Porn is love you can see.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
being pregnant is like rehab
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
Randomize
