We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
