I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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