I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Umm I'm too high to move.
some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
planned parenthood is perfect for picking up chicks...they all put out
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
