Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
We just got home. I got some malt liqour and a lottery ticket so I'm really doing a lot with my life right now
I had my own version of the Hangover last night. I woke up to a disassembled Christmas tree, shit on the futon, and a hamster in the bathroom with a necklace on that said "Feed Me Bitch." I don't own a hamster. I don't know what I drank last night, but I want to do it again.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
All those movies are bullshit, there is no way to run down a line of parked cars, they`re too far apart. my faces hurts so much right now
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
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