I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Someone obviously heard us on their way to class. They stopped at my door and started singing afternoon delight.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
You thought your socks were broken. They were just inside out.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
