he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
welp wont be popping out a kid with a beret. frenchie is gone and the mother nature showed herself. bilingual kid can be erased from the bucket list
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
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