Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
Be still, my beating vagina.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I piss off the neighbors just so I can have someone to compete with.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Randomize