im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Just watched a guy puke off his bike. Beyond impressed. He didn't even swerve
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
You talked the cab driver into taking a shot from your flask at a red light because "Ray Charles would want him to"
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
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