ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
