So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Even though we had just had to physically take her off of someones lawn she was peeing on when they came outside, she still insisted on walking unassisted the rest of the way home. It was dignity meets shit show.
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
the texts you sent will act as the rosetta stone for all drunk people
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Randomize
