I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Randomize
