clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Yeah but now he has a wife. It’s going to be different this year
So what. We’ve banged every Thanksgiving since high school. She just has to understand it’s a holiday tradition
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