Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
i swear to god, this restaurant is playing a john tesh cover of a song from aladdin
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I made a Wendy's employee say fuck this and quit because I started flipping out due to a baked potato shortage. Of course I had a good night
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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