Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
No way hahaha I have zero intention of adding him I wanna just join in on a three some but mostly just be there for moral support and snacks
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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