my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
hes out at the street wearing a tophat and a monocole and carrying a cane and greeting every car that drives by
he just went across the street and into someones house and we could hear him inviting them over from the front porch
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
Seriously. All i can say is im covered in mud, my jaw hurts, i cannot straighten my arm, egg is everywhere, and there is a dead squirrel.
When you wake up, just ignore the mess in the bathroom. I'll take her home when I'm off work.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Randomize
