I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I found my phone outside under the leaves by the curb. What the fuck did I do last night
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I would just like to point out that someone I had sex with drove me so I could have sex with you. I deserve some type of "most loyal booty call ever" award.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
dude, i told you to rally, so you sprinted upstairs, knocked some girl down, and without missing a beat said, "not now bitch, im in the fucking zone" and took off
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
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