He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
His baby mama found the pictures of us, she couldn't see my face but she could see my asshole. So I'm safe.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
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