pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I COULD CUT A FUCKING DIAMOND WITH MY RIGHT NIPPLE RIGHT NOW HOLY FUCK
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
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