how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
Yeah, but thats the third time she's peed on me.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
Randomize
