GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
We are the best cocktail. We look appealing, taste amazing, and ruin lives.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize