Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
My pants zipper is stuck halfway down. I have to interview an intern later. This day is gonna be amazing,
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Randomize
