Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
I woke up and found piles of popcorn in a trail around my house, ending at a laundry basket full of pillows. What were we trying to catch last night?
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
