you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Randomize