we have officially lost it.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
Randomize
