so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize