I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
Randomize
