I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
