so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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