Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
i think my tv is drunk
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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