Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
