We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Randomize
