the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
My ass is underappreciated
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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