Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
You called his parrot a seagull, a pigeon and a rat with wings, and told it to go eat Cheetos out of a dumpster.
I forgot wine drunk hurts
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