i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
I told him we could use my stove to make weed brownies, from that point on he kept reffering to me as "best pledge ever"
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
drying my bra with a hair dryer wasn't exactly how I had planned on starting my day.
You are the jesus of drinking
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
