We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Randomize
