Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize