glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I think you handled your pregnancy scares better than that cricket in your bathroom
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
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